Who The Tea Party Wants

C. Boyden Gray. Sure, he’s a long-time Republican. But with a name like that, you can bet he went to Andover and Princeton, all anethema to the Tea Party voters. Those schools produce atheists and sophisticates, the very people who look down on Tea Party types.
 
C. Boyden Gray [I really have no idea who he is] was quoted in an article on Republicans dissatisfied with the showing of the current crop of GOP candidates for the presidency, esp on foreign policy. Their lack of knowledge of even the names of countries and their locations, let alone their leaders’ names and current events there pains the stalwarts of the Grand Old Party but are music to the ears of people who do not read books or watch PBS documentaries.
 
These folks like their history patriotic, the religion old time, and their politics straight out of the cracker barrel. Anything other than that makes them think of “revenooers” and “fancy pants Easterners”. Nonsense, of course, but these people were raised on a diet of John Wayne and, later, Clint Eastwood taking out the bad guys and resolving problems with a fast draw and faster fists. Remember how John Wayne would whirl around on a guy with a fat mouth and bust him one? That’s what they want in a lawman, someone to take out the punks.
 
Foreigners? We took them in in large numbers but we’re done with that now. Minorities? Recently Kim of The Nation Magazine stated that his research found that Tea Partiers believe the government is handing tax-payers’ money over to African-Americans. They loves them some Herman Cain so they can cover their horror at the thought of a Black man in charge, knowing Cain can never win the presidency.
 
Poor people? Life’s losers. After all, we’re a nation led by Zig Ziegler, good ol’ “see you at the top” Zig. Just sell enough brushes or lick enough evelopes and you’ll be sitting beside Zig on your own yacht. So keep taxes on the wealthy as low as possible because one day you’ll be among them. Get the money to run things out of those shlubs you work with, the ones who don’t think big, who believe owning your own home and sending your kids to college is a big deal. Some call it gutting the middle class, but even the middle class votes Republican a good deal of the time, sick of gays and Blacks running the country.
 
Health care? I used to be seriously contemptuous of people who couldn’t pay for medical care, but recently I found a spot on my right arm that has turned colors and really looks funny. I’m thinking maybe I’ll just rely on that Obamacare, at least until I sell enough brushes to own the hospital.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *